So this started out a little different....

I started this blog to talk about things of the past and what I had learned.  But I want to take this a little down a different path - yet the title of the blog it's self still applies. 

A few years ago I read a few inspirational self help type books got some knowledge from them and have grown considerably.  The Power of Positive Thinking - Norman Vincent Peale, and Don't sweat the small stuff...Richard Carlson   More recently I've gotten back into reading and to my liking I've read some great books:

The Jackrabbit Factor - Leslie Householder
Hidden Treasures - Leslie Householder
Secrets of the Millionaire Mind - T Harv Eker

The Power of Now is currently being read - Eckhart Tolle

I've also read books like The Secret, The Millionaire next door, Rich Dad Poor Dad, and one about Acres of Diamonds (I think something like that).

And I have about 10 more on my list to read - most of them on my iphone and I'll be listening to them while I walk. 

Here's the idea though these books all have one thing in common basically we are in charge, we are where we are right now because of the way we once thought or things have been told to us and we need to take a stand and make our own difference.  So as I read these books I will follow the things they tell me to do, to get what I want out of life.  I will keep this blog to track my progress.  I'll blog both my assignments and what I'm doing to fulfill them.

We'll call this My Hope Chest.  Filling up my chest with great things that have the potential to help me reach my goals.

The last book I read talked about Net worth.  And that what you track grows (caution if you track negative things they grow and expand also)  So to start off with to track my progress in a monetary way I'll will start out by saying that I believe that our net worth is currently $0.
We have very little debt compared to the majority of Americans however we don't budget well and continue to live pay check to pay check.  I will take the time to figure out our true net worth and will post that at a later date.  But for now $0 will have to do.

Are you ready for this?  I am; I expect great things to happen.  Let me tell you a story about why I believe that you can attract things to you by your thoughts (according to The Secret).

About 3 years ago we were living in Texas.  We were foster parents to 1 baby girl and had an opening for 1 more child.  Several weeks had gone by and nothing.  Then one night I had a dream about a baby boy.  That morning after I woke up I announced to my hubby, kids and visiting relatives that we were going to be getting a new foster baby.  It was going to be a boy and he was going to be a preemie.  I even went so far as to pull out a baby bottle I had, that was designed especially for preemies, it was blue with sport stuff on it.  I place the bottle by the kitchen window a place where I would see it everyday and think about the day this baby boy would be joining our family.  I didn't have to wait long.  One week later I got the call.  They wanted to know if I would take a barely 5 pound baby boy.

This is not the only experience I've had with this, but it is the most profound.

Where do you spend your 60,000 a day?

I’d like you to spend a day thinking about the things you spend your days thinking about.  I know crazy huh?  Or is it?  On average you think 60,000 thoughts a day and 56,000 of them are about you, your needs, your wants, your situation…

That’s a lot of thinking time that could be used for your own good or for bad.  Positive or negative.  Your life parallels your thoughts, you attract into your life the things you think about most. 

If you continually think I’ll always be heavy  - you will always be heavy.

If you think I never have enough money - you will never have enough money.

If you think my life sucks, it will suck – until you change your mind.

The people you know who have what you would consider abundance, have that because they knew in their minds what they wanted and they went for it.  They suppressed all doubts and went all out, worked hard, and achieved the goals they had set.

Here’s an example:

I have started every diet on the planet.  And most started the same way I’d spend a week planning preparing buy the ‘right’ allowed foods.  This time was different I was going to do it finally.  I eat all the junk I could stand over the weekend because on Monday I was going to change.  Then Monday would come and by the time breakfast was over I was already wondering what the crap was I thinking I can’t do this it’s too hard.  Sometimes I’d give up right then, sometime I’d continue on for a few days all the while feeling down and telling myself over and over that this just wasn’t worth it.  Needless to say I never lost anything of any significance. 

Then I changed my plan – I just started.  I changed my thoughts to “I can do this”; “I’m  in the process of being healthy” and I never let doubts stay in my mind I send them packing and immediately think a good positive thought.  As for my ‘diet’ I just started eating one healthy meal a day, one more glass of water and a short walk.  Gradually I add something else to my day.  Slowly I’m liking myself better even though I’m not yet the size I’d like to be.  Another tip each day you get on the scale you cement the ‘heavy’ number into your mind.  My scale has my goal weight taped on it.  Sound funny?  Maybe….but I just tried on a smaller size pants and while I’m not ready to wear them just yet I’m closer than I ever have been. 

One more tip.  Throw out clothing that is too big for you, especially as you lose the weight and need smaller clothes.  Keeping them is a doubt in your mind that you might need them again.  Get rid of all doubts – they are what’s keeping you from reaching your goal.

Back to thinking positive.  If you are not happy with your life change your thinking and start thinking like you would in a better life.  Surround yourself with people living the life you dream of.  You’ll discover that they are just like you, only thing is they overcame their doubts.  This is not a gimmick you can live an abundant life, you can be the person you always wanted to be.  You just have to get rid of the doubts.

I know what my thoughts were growing up, and even just a few years ago.  And I remember how I felt about life.  I also know what I think about today and how much different my life is.  Your mind is such a powerful resource and it’s free use it wisely.  It doesn’t cost you any more to think positive as it does to think negative.  It does require training, but that training is free.

Book Recommendations: The Secret by Rhonda Byrne, The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale, and Brain Rules by John Medina

Changing the Voice Within

Choose to be happy

2 Nephi 2:25 - …men are that they might have joy.

I have to admit that I had forgotten that; and for a time I fell into a life of fear, rather than faith.

I grew up in an LDS community, and have been a member all my life.  I was raised by a single parent, and at the time, I felt like I was the only one in a family situation like that.  It wasn’t common where we lived, but I really wasn’t the only one, it just felt that way.  I felt alone, different, and singled out.  My mother generally worked 2 jobs and therefore wasn’t able to provide the mental nourishment my fragile yet growing mind needed.  I withdrew, kept my worries and fears silent, and ultimately developed a negative attitude towards life.  Then as an adult myself; add to that the worries and fears brought on by being married to a soldier, dangerous work and long deployments.  Then top it all off with the worries and fears brought on having 2 children with juvenile diabetes, a chronic disease that is on your mind 24/7. 

True to my childhood I kept everything inside, never asked for help, I felt I was fine, after all I had always done it this way.  To say the least it all got the best of me and my rock bottom was the day I was taken to the ER in an ambulance for a panic attack.  At the time I didn’t even know what a panic attack was.  My husband was in month 12 of a 15 month deployment, and I felt I had failed.  I had to look at my life and realize that despite being married to a wonderful man and having 4 awesome daughters I still suffered from depression, anxiety, and panic attacks.  It has been a long journey, but I hope my path can help others.

D & C 6:36 – Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not

Upon first being diagnosed I was told by my doctor that he sees this kind of thing a lot. He basically sent me home with a prescription and told me to read up on the subject.  That was it, my world as I knew it was over (or so I thought) and I was sent home to ‘suffer alone’.  I had no other plan so I did as was told.  I also made sure I was reading my scriptures and daily prayed for a better way. 

There is a vicious cycle with having these 3 issues.  The anxiety gives you no desire to change things; and leaves you in fear of everything, including that you will have another panic attack just from thinking about change.  With the depression you have no hope that things can get better, even if you do make changes.  The books I started but never got past the first chapter in didn’t help. I felt I was being told that I would be this way forever and that there was no hope.  I do feel there are better books out there today, but at the time I had gotten mine from the library and they were most likely outdated.  I have heard of people ‘walking on eggshells’ around others trying to avoid a confrontation.  Try walking on eggshells to avoid your own self.  Trying to make sure your own thoughts and feelings don’t do you in.  I just learned to be cautious and avoided new situations as much as possible.  However deep inside I knew this wasn’t right, I knew that I was here for a purpose and by sitting idly by letting this get the better of me I was not fulfilling my purpose. 

Joshua 1:9 – Have I not commanded thee? Be strong and of good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for I the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.

I really cannot tell you how it happened but one day, by the grace of God, I made a startling connection.  My negative thoughts had a direct effect on the physical breakdown of my body.  My negative and sad ways although hidden from the world caused my heart to race, caused me to feel like I couldn’t breathe. The ton of bricks sitting on my chest was there because of thoughts in my head.  My own thoughts left me feeling like there was no hope.  I realized that I, myself, was causing my own pain and suffering.  Change my thoughts, change my life…I had heard that before, but this time it was personal.  After some research I went out in search of books that would help me think in a positive way.  I found several about thinking better and also not letting things worry me.  That life was too short to worry about some things that are just not important enough.  I read them as much as I could in all my spare time, and with each one my hope grew just a little.  Months later I had built faith that I could begin to live life to the fullest.  Although it has taken years to rid my mind of the doubts, they are slowly disappearing.  It has been a journey, but one that has been very worth taking.

Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

I began writing a ‘to do’ list, of things I needed to get better.  At the top of my list was to read my scriptures and say my prayers everyday without fail.  I also started to replace negatives with positives; I did this by memorizing scriptures, the Articles of Faith, and positive quotes.  I had a stack of 3x5 cards I had written things I wanted to memorize on and carried them with me everywhere.  When I had a spare moment I’d start memorizing.  Or if I felt the anxiety rising I’d pull them out and read through them. I needed to eat healthier every day; I began 30 minutes of exercise, and tried to get plenty of rest.  I stopped watching the news and even went so far as to distance myself from negative situations or people.  I also had to keep myself busy, rather than sitting around feeling sorry for myself.  Searching out others in need helped; volunteer work provided a perfect distraction.  Then I began to hunt down things that made me happy.  I knew my family made me happy so we started doing more family nights, movies, games, sports.  I also tried new crafts, and new hobbies, it took several attempts until I found one that I truly enjoyed.  It helped immensely that what I found I was good at, could be used by others in their joyous celebrations.  Although it didn’t happen overnight, things did start to improve.

I also learned that while I thought my life was bad, I knew it wasn’t the worst out there.  Everyone out there has a ‘my life is horrible because’ story.  But the healthy minds learn to deal with it and move on, and as for the unhealthy minds like mine, we just needed someone to teach us that things can be different, if we choose to think different.

When I felt I was gaining control of my life back I went off my happy meds, under the supervision of my doctor.  I’m happy to report that I have maintained a happier life for several years now; despite the ups and downs life still hands me.  I can face my fears and my worries without them getting me down.  Many times I can brush them aside and not give them a second thought.

Heavenly Father, and his son, Jesus Christ, are our own personal fan club members.  Nothing brings them greater joy than seeing us fight our battles and come out on top.  Of course we don’t do it alone, they are both there right beside us.  Stepping in and taking over when we have reached our limit.  I’m grateful that I was guided to find a way back to the lighter side of things, that my breaking limit is greater than it was previously.   

Moses 1:39 – For behold, this is my work and my glory – to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.

It is my wish, to help others find their way; back to light, hope, and love.